A child sat on Jesus' lapin the splendor of heaven.The child asked, "Is it time?"Jesus parted the clouds, looked and said,"No, not yet child."The child asked "When will it be time?"Jesus replied, "When lessons are learned,hardships endured, and loneliness lived,then it will be time."Time passed. The child asked, "Is it time?"Jesus parted the clouds, looked and said,"No, not yet child."The child asked, "When will it be time?"Jesus replied, "When maturity is reached,self-worth affirmed and spirits strengthened, then it will be time."Time passed. The child asked, "Is it time?"Jesus parted the clouds, looked and said,"Their love is strong and their hearts are open.Yes, now it is time-Your parents are ready."~author unknown
le
Monday, September 8, 2008
Thursday, August 21, 2008
Shower and other stuff....
I FINALLY had a shower for the baby girl I have always wanted!! Yeah me! It was lots of fun and I had so many friends and family members from near and far show up. It was very special. I got lot's of the things I registered for and still have lots of shopping to do on my own. I will post some pictures later today when I have time to download them from my camera.
No new news on the baby yet exept that in a week or so one of my online friends who is adopting from the same province in going to pick up her little girl and I am hoping she might take some pics of our Little Aubrey Sophia Mei (final version of the name I think). So I am excited about that. Still no news on our LOA (letter of acceptance) but this is not out of the norm so nothing to worry about. Still looks like it may be end of Sept to First couple of weeks in Oct. for travelling.
On a personal note please think of me and if you are a praying person, I could use a few. I have been having some pretty bad anxiety and insomnia. I don't really know what is causing it. I thought I was handling everything ok but I guess it has just caught up with me. I am working on about 4 days without a lot of sleep. So I am getting kind of loopy and quite frustrated:) But on the other hand trying to count my blessings. Headed for a massage today.
No new news on the baby yet exept that in a week or so one of my online friends who is adopting from the same province in going to pick up her little girl and I am hoping she might take some pics of our Little Aubrey Sophia Mei (final version of the name I think). So I am excited about that. Still no news on our LOA (letter of acceptance) but this is not out of the norm so nothing to worry about. Still looks like it may be end of Sept to First couple of weeks in Oct. for travelling.
On a personal note please think of me and if you are a praying person, I could use a few. I have been having some pretty bad anxiety and insomnia. I don't really know what is causing it. I thought I was handling everything ok but I guess it has just caught up with me. I am working on about 4 days without a lot of sleep. So I am getting kind of loopy and quite frustrated:) But on the other hand trying to count my blessings. Headed for a massage today.
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Update from our agency today!!
Our little one is doing well, breaks my heart she's growing so fast without us! They reported that at the beginning of July (15 months old) she weighed 24 lbs was 30 inches tall, she has 7 teeth, she is very active and can walk with assistance but not on her own yet. She likes to eat like her Mama:) she is shy but she likes to be held and cuddled. We also got our first travel packet today, just another milestone.......we can't wait!!
Sunday, July 20, 2008
I've been tagged!!
Being fairly new to this blogging thing I had never heard of "being tagged" but in trying to keep up with my new found blogging friends I discovered after doing much travelling the last two weeks and not having much time in front of my beloved computer that I had been tagged by my friend Ashley http://www.alegacyofhope.blogspot.com/ ........we share a common thread, we are both adopting from China and we are using the same agency. I have learned that the adoption community is extremely supportive, we all go through the same ups and downs and no one truly understands better than the other Mommies who are waiting along with us. We feel hopeful when others receive their special news, elated when we can share our own and then guilty when others are still struggling through the wait. I am very hopeful that Ashley will be blessed with a referral very soon (maybe even for twins!!).......
So this tagging thing involves describing yourself in six words.....and then tagging other friends to keep it going. I'll give it a shot, lord knows I don't mind talking about myself!
Impatient...I am an extremely impatient woman. I know this is not a flattering quality and I try to control it to no avail:) I have always been an immediate gratification type person. The adoption process does not lend itself favorably to my personality hence the reason I have suffered so much anxiety!! I have wanted another child for oh. let's just round it off to 12 years (my dear son Zach is 14)......so many years have passed with this longing in my heart. It has been hard. I've endure failed fertility procedures, as has my poor dear husband Jimmy, I'll spare the details but boy has he been a trouper... and supportively watched as every friend and family member of child baring age has had one child, then two. It has taught me a lesson about patience, when I see the precious pictures of my new baby girl, I now know why I have waited, I was waiting for her, it is as clear as it can be to me now, I was supposed to wait for her.
Mom...I have been a Mom since the way to young age of 21. Although I was mature and had a natural instinct for mothering, it was definitely a trial and error endeavor. I learned how to be a Mom when I still had a lot of maturing to do myself. But I must say of all my accomplishments, I look at my bright, handsome, talented, funny, happy, compassionate, really cool son and I can see I have done well with him. He has always had a special something, I know parents always say this, but the day he was born I knew instinctively that he had a powerful destiny, he will be someone of significance, of distinction, a leader, not your average Joe. I can't say what it is but Zach is special. I can't take all the credit, most of it is just who he is...but I know my love has gotten through to him, I know it has touched him, he has an old soul. When my impatience with his teenage antics rears it's head...well let's just say we have our moments like any mother and child....but he is my best friend and we are so close, being his Mom is the greatest blessing and joy of my life.
Passionate....Ok, I promise this is not that kind of blog, no smutty talk here:) I am talking about a quality that I possess and it runs a broad spectrum. You could probably also call this anal retentive or maybe even obsessive compulsive but I am choosing to put a positive spin on it. I care and feel and believe so deeply....when I take something on it consumes me, it ravages my mind and I cannot let it go, it becomes my cause, my obsession until it is done. Fertility treatments, adoption, work, family, my home, politics, the environment, education, reading, learning, helping....whatever it is I am passionate about it.
Determined....aka stubborn. I can not believe my dream of having a little girl to love is about to come true. It has taken tenacity and sheer will to move this process forward, it is not easy. It should not be easy, after all a child's well being is at stake. It annoys me when people scoff at how long it has taken and how much work it has been for me or worst of all how much it has cost...they often say, it should be easier to adopt...so many children need homes! Part of me wants to jump on board with that idea because I know that we will give this child a wonderful home, but if it was really easy, I fear that some children may not be so fortunate as to end up in loving homes. I have been determined and it has been worth it.
Two more to go...this is getting long, told you I like to talk about myself!
Ready to move on with life.....okay that is not a one word description but it does describe how I feel. I am ready to bring our lovely daughter home and be her mommy and put the years of longing for another child behind me. No more obsessing over the computer and all my many adoption groups and blogs (not that I will ever completely break that habit) I just want to experience a life without feeling that there is something missing.
Hopeful.....I end with hopeful because I truly am, when I look at the pictures of Aubrey (yes we are changing the spelling) I feel love that I can not describe for a child that I have never held, but I hold her in my heart, a child that I did not bear, but she was conceived in my imagination so very long ago, a child that I have placed my hopes and dreams in....just a few more months and a little more patience.
Have to figure out who to tag later.....
So this tagging thing involves describing yourself in six words.....and then tagging other friends to keep it going. I'll give it a shot, lord knows I don't mind talking about myself!
Impatient...I am an extremely impatient woman. I know this is not a flattering quality and I try to control it to no avail:) I have always been an immediate gratification type person. The adoption process does not lend itself favorably to my personality hence the reason I have suffered so much anxiety!! I have wanted another child for oh. let's just round it off to 12 years (my dear son Zach is 14)......so many years have passed with this longing in my heart. It has been hard. I've endure failed fertility procedures, as has my poor dear husband Jimmy, I'll spare the details but boy has he been a trouper... and supportively watched as every friend and family member of child baring age has had one child, then two. It has taught me a lesson about patience, when I see the precious pictures of my new baby girl, I now know why I have waited, I was waiting for her, it is as clear as it can be to me now, I was supposed to wait for her.
Mom...I have been a Mom since the way to young age of 21. Although I was mature and had a natural instinct for mothering, it was definitely a trial and error endeavor. I learned how to be a Mom when I still had a lot of maturing to do myself. But I must say of all my accomplishments, I look at my bright, handsome, talented, funny, happy, compassionate, really cool son and I can see I have done well with him. He has always had a special something, I know parents always say this, but the day he was born I knew instinctively that he had a powerful destiny, he will be someone of significance, of distinction, a leader, not your average Joe. I can't say what it is but Zach is special. I can't take all the credit, most of it is just who he is...but I know my love has gotten through to him, I know it has touched him, he has an old soul. When my impatience with his teenage antics rears it's head...well let's just say we have our moments like any mother and child....but he is my best friend and we are so close, being his Mom is the greatest blessing and joy of my life.
Passionate....Ok, I promise this is not that kind of blog, no smutty talk here:) I am talking about a quality that I possess and it runs a broad spectrum. You could probably also call this anal retentive or maybe even obsessive compulsive but I am choosing to put a positive spin on it. I care and feel and believe so deeply....when I take something on it consumes me, it ravages my mind and I cannot let it go, it becomes my cause, my obsession until it is done. Fertility treatments, adoption, work, family, my home, politics, the environment, education, reading, learning, helping....whatever it is I am passionate about it.
Determined....aka stubborn. I can not believe my dream of having a little girl to love is about to come true. It has taken tenacity and sheer will to move this process forward, it is not easy. It should not be easy, after all a child's well being is at stake. It annoys me when people scoff at how long it has taken and how much work it has been for me or worst of all how much it has cost...they often say, it should be easier to adopt...so many children need homes! Part of me wants to jump on board with that idea because I know that we will give this child a wonderful home, but if it was really easy, I fear that some children may not be so fortunate as to end up in loving homes. I have been determined and it has been worth it.
Two more to go...this is getting long, told you I like to talk about myself!
Ready to move on with life.....okay that is not a one word description but it does describe how I feel. I am ready to bring our lovely daughter home and be her mommy and put the years of longing for another child behind me. No more obsessing over the computer and all my many adoption groups and blogs (not that I will ever completely break that habit) I just want to experience a life without feeling that there is something missing.
Hopeful.....I end with hopeful because I truly am, when I look at the pictures of Aubrey (yes we are changing the spelling) I feel love that I can not describe for a child that I have never held, but I hold her in my heart, a child that I did not bear, but she was conceived in my imagination so very long ago, a child that I have placed my hopes and dreams in....just a few more months and a little more patience.
Have to figure out who to tag later.....
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Where in the world is our baby girl? She is in Henan Province, in Zhengzhou City. She was found abandoned under a bridge in Xinzheng City at a little over a month old by a police officer and was taken to Zhengzhou City Social Welfare Institute (an orphanage), shortly afterward she was placed in foster care in Kaifeng with an older foster care mother who appears to have taken good care of her and loved her, she is now back in Zhengzhou back in orphanage care. It makes me so sad to think about the terrible circumstances that could force a mother to leave her baby under a bridge.
Sunday, July 13, 2008
Vacation Over, Reality Setting In
Ok, for the first time in a long time...I had a real vacation. Poor Jimmy and Kent had to work, but the rest of us had fun. We rented a condo, it was me and Jimmy, our good friends Kent and Amanda, Zach and his buddy Cody. I now have a tan and a refreshed mind. I have come back home to the reality that I have a lot of work to do....work work and adoption work. Hopefully there will be a shower in the next few week so I can start checking off my long list of baby things that I need.
Thursday, July 10, 2008
Introducing Aubre MeiLin Lee!! We finally got our Pre-Approval letter today so we can share our news with the world....after a long wait we finally get to be parents to this beautiful little girl. But we still have a bit of a wait ahead, we wait now for our letter of acceptance and then finally a travel approval, so it should be around the end of Sept. if I had to hazzard a guess. Here is what we know about her, she was born on March 20, 2007, and was cared for in foster care until recently. She is currently 15 months old and resides in Henan Province, China at the Zhengzhou City Social Welfare Institute. She possibly has a minor heart defect, but is otherwise healthy and thriving. She weighed 21 lbs at 11.5 months and was 28 inches long(for those of you who do not know, Chinese bundle thier children with many layers of clothing, she is dressed in many layers in the pictures). Zheng Shuang likes people to play with her, and when she is played with, she will giggle happily. She loves to play with adults and is so cute. She likes to watch TV, and when she sees something happy, she will smile excitedly. Now Zheng Shuang can sit steadily by herself and she likes to sit in her crib and play with toys. Her favorite toy is a little drum, and she always loves to beat on it, looking very absorbed. She can use her hands to pick up a light object, and she can walk backward in the baby walker. We are just in love with her and can not wait to bring her into our family!
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