I've been tagged!!

Being fairly new to this blogging thing I had never heard of "being tagged" but in trying to keep up with my new found blogging friends I discovered after doing much travelling the last two weeks and not having much time in front of my beloved computer that I had been tagged by my friend Ashley http://www.alegacyofhope.blogspot.com/ ........we share a common thread, we are both adopting from China and we are using the same agency. I have learned that the adoption community is extremely supportive, we all go through the same ups and downs and no one truly understands better than the other Mommies who are waiting along with us. We feel hopeful when others receive their special news, elated when we can share our own and then guilty when others are still struggling through the wait. I am very hopeful that Ashley will be blessed with a referral very soon (maybe even for twins!!).......

So this tagging thing involves describing yourself in six words.....and then tagging other friends to keep it going. I'll give it a shot, lord knows I don't mind talking about myself!

Impatient...I am an extremely impatient woman. I know this is not a flattering quality and I try to control it to no avail:) I have always been an immediate gratification type person. The adoption process does not lend itself favorably to my personality hence the reason I have suffered so much anxiety!! I have wanted another child for oh. let's just round it off to 12 years (my dear son Zach is 14)......so many years have passed with this longing in my heart. It has been hard. I've endure failed fertility procedures, as has my poor dear husband Jimmy, I'll spare the details but boy has he been a trouper... and supportively watched as every friend and family member of child baring age has had one child, then two. It has taught me a lesson about patience, when I see the precious pictures of my new baby girl, I now know why I have waited, I was waiting for her, it is as clear as it can be to me now, I was supposed to wait for her.

Mom...I have been a Mom since the way to young age of 21. Although I was mature and had a natural instinct for mothering, it was definitely a trial and error endeavor. I learned how to be a Mom when I still had a lot of maturing to do myself. But I must say of all my accomplishments, I look at my bright, handsome, talented, funny, happy, compassionate, really cool son and I can see I have done well with him. He has always had a special something, I know parents always say this, but the day he was born I knew instinctively that he had a powerful destiny, he will be someone of significance, of distinction, a leader, not your average Joe. I can't say what it is but Zach is special. I can't take all the credit, most of it is just who he is...but I know my love has gotten through to him, I know it has touched him, he has an old soul. When my impatience with his teenage antics rears it's head...well let's just say we have our moments like any mother and child....but he is my best friend and we are so close, being his Mom is the greatest blessing and joy of my life.

Passionate....Ok, I promise this is not that kind of blog, no smutty talk here:) I am talking about a quality that I possess and it runs a broad spectrum. You could probably also call this anal retentive or maybe even obsessive compulsive but I am choosing to put a positive spin on it. I care and feel and believe so deeply....when I take something on it consumes me, it ravages my mind and I cannot let it go, it becomes my cause, my obsession until it is done. Fertility treatments, adoption, work, family, my home, politics, the environment, education, reading, learning, helping....whatever it is I am passionate about it.

Determined....aka stubborn. I can not believe my dream of having a little girl to love is about to come true. It has taken tenacity and sheer will to move this process forward, it is not easy. It should not be easy, after all a child's well being is at stake. It annoys me when people scoff at how long it has taken and how much work it has been for me or worst of all how much it has cost...they often say, it should be easier to adopt...so many children need homes! Part of me wants to jump on board with that idea because I know that we will give this child a wonderful home, but if it was really easy, I fear that some children may not be so fortunate as to end up in loving homes. I have been determined and it has been worth it.

Two more to go...this is getting long, told you I like to talk about myself!

Ready to move on with life.....okay that is not a one word description but it does describe how I feel. I am ready to bring our lovely daughter home and be her mommy and put the years of longing for another child behind me. No more obsessing over the computer and all my many adoption groups and blogs (not that I will ever completely break that habit) I just want to experience a life without feeling that there is something missing.

Hopeful.....I end with hopeful because I truly am, when I look at the pictures of Aubrey (yes we are changing the spelling) I feel love that I can not describe for a child that I have never held, but I hold her in my heart, a child that I did not bear, but she was conceived in my imagination so very long ago, a child that I have placed my hopes and dreams in....just a few more months and a little more patience.

Have to figure out who to tag later.....